I have eaten every morsel I see.
My eyes were big, but my stomach bigger.
Nothing it seemed could satisfy the hunger within,
so I filled myself.
With wisdom from others, each bite was delicious.
So I consumed more,
as I ate more,
I sensed what power there was in each bite.
Each bite a revelation.
I couldn’t stop to marvel at the nuances,
I needed more.
My soul needed more.
I needed to eat and eat and satisfy a deep hunger that was placed inside me since the beginning of creation.
My instinctual hunger was burning,
so I ate.
Until one day I sensed there was something else.
My stomach had reached its fill.
In my abundance I knew my journey wasn’t over.
I knew my body was craving a transformation.
Something from within me and somewhere from without me,
I had to find a safe space to transform.
I knew it would be hard,
but I had no idea it would take every inch of my being.
I had to let go of everything.
I had to reject all that I knew.
I had to create demise.
A tear down of every part of me that I thought ‘I knew’ I was.
Because something in me said TRANSFORM.
And I gave myself willingly to that voice.
I demanded my soul to honor and revel in this mystery that was now taking over.
I saw slowly how things were stripping away.
I saw slowly how people left that were not necessary to the journey…
For now at least.
I saw how things I once valued lost all their power and meaning.
I saw how the hungry one I once was looked different from the one I was becoming.
I’d sometimes try to fight the process of the next stage that was slowly taking me over.
I’d scream and cry and bag,
“I can’t handle this burden that my life seems to demand of me!”
But as fast as my confession would come out,
a response with smacked me right back.
This is what you were made for.
Take heed in these lessons,
for they will only last for so long.
Open your heart.
Open your eyes.
Open your hands.
Write what you know on the fabric of your skin.
Wear it as the finest clothing you own.
Someday you will showcase your hurt.
Someday you will show people the map you have etched into every inch of your being.
So for now,
stay in your coon,
your time is almost complete.
Learn all that you can in the space where Ive drawn you too.
Because soon you will see the fabric in which you’ve sewn and you don’t want to drop a stitch.