Valerie B.   Fighting Through the Brokenness 

 

Every day is a new and beautiful journey and I can’t wait to see what it has in store for me

 


I grew up in a broken family. My parents weren’t divorced…still aren’t actually. But the brokenness in my family was toxic. My dad was an addict who did what he thought was “his best” with raising us. We always had food on our table and a roof over our heads so we were very blessed in that regard. But, it was far from the ideal family. My mom would scream and curse my dad while he would sulk in the corner. At a young age I would be so angry with my mom for “being mean to dad.” I didn’t realize she was angry because he was drunk or high on pain pills.

Things got real strange when I was about 10 years old and my dad told me he was thinking about divorcing mom. I remember thinking he should, because mom was so mean.

As I got a little older I realized what was going on and the brokenness in our family continued. I was always looking for an outlet; being at home was so depressing. When I was a little girl I would run to the big open field behind our mobile in the trailer court and just cry and wish I didn’t have to go back home. So much hate lived there. I always held on to my dream of what my life would be like as I got older and didn’t have to live with my parents anymore.

In high school it was just as worse as ever. We had moved to a small town outside of Yakima named Cowiche and my dad now lived in the apartment on the other side of the garage. He would come over for dinner and sulk his way back after being verbally abused by my mom for his drunken/ high state. I never wanted to be home. I got involved in about every extra curricular activity I could think of at school. I loved the safe place I felt with my friends in a positive environment away from all the yelling and hurt.

When I turned 15 I started partying. Drinking way too young. It felt good to be a part of a group of people who had fun together even if it was the wrong kind of fun. Even though I got caught up in that life I was still a hard working student that loved sports and being apart of my little community.

Teachers always talked to us about college and I knew that would be my ticket out. And it was…I met my husband who is the most caring compassionate man I know. He loves unconditionally and will do anything for the people he cares about. We now have two beautiful boys and I am blessed beyond my wildest dreams.

Growing up I always dreamed of what a loving and warm home would be like and now I have one.

When I stop and think about it, it seems so surreal. I am apart of this and I’m not stopping here. I have so much I want to accomplish, so many hidden talents I want to discover and use to help others. Every day is a new and beautiful journey and I can’t wait to see what it has in store for me

-Valerie B.

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